Public Speaking – My Living Nightmare

Public speaking… is like torture for me.

Even the idea of it makes me nervous. I’ve never really been a fan of it, but it’s definitely got worse over the years. I’m not sure if I lack confidence in myself or what, but it’s awful. When it comes to class presentations I get myself in such a state. When I’m actually standing there talking I’m okay, but leading up to it… I can’t cope! I know I’m not the only one who has problems with public speaking – I know loads of people who do, but when it comes to your turn you just feel all alone and pressured. Even the week or so leading up to the presentation I get nervous. My eating cuts down more and more each day, and on the day I literally cannot eat a thing until it is over.

It’s really quite frustrating. I have such bad anxiety, and when it comes to public speaking… Well, that just takes my anxiety to a whole new level. I just wish I could say to myself “man up. You will be fine! It’s nothing…”. But whenever I tell myself that it just doesn’t sink in. Then after it’s done I say to myself, “see, it wasn’t that bad…”. It’s a nightmare!

I guess I sort of envy people who are completely fine with public speaking. Not in a horrible way, just like “why can’t I be like them?”. The relief when it’s over though is a great feeling, but up until then it’s horrible.

One thing I am really nervous about it my graduation this summer. After three years at university, I will finally be graduating in July… But why is it that everybody, apart from me, is looking forward to it? Obviously I can’t wait to pass my degree and graduate, but the whole ceremony is what scares me! Having to walk up in front of hundreds of people and…. Urgh, I can’t even think about it right now 😦

Hopefully one day I will be able to overcome the fear and beat all of the anxiety that comes with it. But until then I guess I will keep plodding along and hope for the best. I guess you just need to remember you’re not alone 🙂

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4 thoughts on “Public Speaking – My Living Nightmare

  1. If it makes you feel any better I’m the exact same,I cant even read in front of my class at school because I get so nervous.I ended up having to tell the teachers that I dreaded going into their classes and lots of them said It was okay and they wouldn’t make me read,Now and then they do but I just say I would prefer not.It has made me dread going to school and at times I even felt like crying with nerves in class.It even made me think about mitching their classes,Just anything to get away from the embarrassment of reading aloud ,I knew getting myself into trouble wasn’t going to make matters any better so I end up going to all my classes.Its even on my mind now that I may have to read out tomorrow which sucks.I did go to Drama lessons which helped me out with my breathing a lot so I would advise giving that a go. Unfortunately I’m still really bad with my anxiety and I would have to admit that it has gotten a lot worse over the last year but my best friend is actually the exact same so we support each other a lot. I’m in secondary school (Ireland,America-High School) so I actually have a career guidance teacher who I can go to if it becomes severe.Its a good idea to talk to someone about it,Because lots of people from my school have came to me telling me they are the exact same.Tell a good friend/parent/guardian or just someone you trust such as a lecturer because they might have some better advice for you.Good Luck with your graduation ! Ill send you over all my love and I hope it goes well x 🙂

    • Thank you so much for your comment!
      Sorry to hear that you have such bad anxiety aswell. It really is horrible isn’t it? 😦 It’s good you have been able to talk to teachers about it and they are understanding with it!
      Support is the one thing that makes you feel much better – if people judge you then you are just going to feel much worse.
      I have had counselling for it, and one of the methods I was told was to wear a bobble/bracelet on your wrist and then play with it when you get anxious. This way it distracts your mind with the pinching and fiddling of that rather than of what you are worried about.
      I hope you don’t have to read out loud tomorrow at school. Try and stay as positive as you can and remember that you’re not alone 🙂 Thank you for that. Same to you, all the best with everything 🙂 xx

  2. Oh when writing my post, I had no idea that you had written about this as well!!!
    I’m so glad you did though because I can relate to everything you said! Anxiety often get the better of me and it sucks!
    Aw congratulations on graduating! I know how nervous I was when I had to go up in front of not one, but TWO campuses to receive my certificate. I was so nervous but I did it!
    And you can do it too! I know it’s hard, trust me I do but it’s just like ripping off a band-aid, once it’s done, you’ll feel relieved! 🙂 xx

    http://tropicalcolours.blogspot.com.au/

    • I didn’t realise you had either until yesterday!
      Aww gosh! Well done for that! It must have took you a lot of courage to do 🙂
      Thank you very much. That’s what I’m going to keep thinking – once it’s over, the relief and happiness I will feel will outrule all of the anxiety 🙂 xx

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